My Last Amen

From the corner of my eye
There's a tear I'm trying to cry
But the feeling can't be found
Like a note thrills in a song
When I play it again, it's gone
Cuz it was never in the sound

And it keeps me wanting
That mysterious thing
Like a night is waiting for a dawn

Every prayer I say (a little closer)
To my resting place (a little closer)
Where my final breath is the beginning
To never needing
And I will find my last Amen

I could swear I have two hearts
One to stay, one to depart
This sad, tragic kingdom
And it burns me down to the core
Because I know there's so much more
It's just a pale reflection
And it keeps me wanting
That mysterious thing
Like an outcast waiting to belong

And while the thrills are fading
The joy is in the waiting
Somewhere in the grand design
It's good be unsatisfied
It keeps the faith and hope a little more alive

This is a new song on Air1 and it has a strange sound, but listen to it if you get a chance!

Forgiveness=Forgetting

Here's a topic brought up in my philosophy class. Just a thought to think about! :)

"It's cliche to say 'Forgive and forget.' However, forgiving is not forgetting. Christians say God forgets your sins, but that is incorrect. God is in fact all knowing, so how could He forget. Would that not take away His omniscient power? You say He "throws it as far as the east is from the west" but He knows where that is too. So how can forgiveness be the same as forgetting? God doesn't ever really "forget" your sins, so what power does that give Him, if He doesn't truly forget."


Yes, I was a little fired up and fought with all the logic I could. :) Thankfully, my God is a lot bigger than a feeling, and He's truth, or I think I would have walked out of that class with a big seed of doubt in my mind. The most frustrating thing about arguing with a philosophy teacher, He's smart!! :) and has thought of just about everything. And I think He's moved beyond rational. But that doesn't scare me. Thank you Jesus for wisdom!

Just some thoughts. Did they get you fired up??



It is in fact here, yet again...my birthday is this weekend!! So in honor of that, what is your most favorite memory of me?? Respond, and I'll give you my most favorite memory with you (that is if they are not the same).

Mysteries of the Gospels

I was reading in Mark the other day about Jesus feeding the 5,000 with just two loaves of bread and five fish. Now, this story is pretty amazing, but at the end I found something strange. After the great "picnic" Jesus sent His disciples get on a boat. Yes, I know a boat. He sent all the people home then went away to pray. While he was praying a storm attacked the boat. Jesus walked on water to go and save them. Every disciple was amazed at how the wind and waves listened to him.

"Then He climbed into the boat and the wind stopped. They were astonished at what the saw."

(now here's the strange part)

"They still did not understand the significance of the miracle of the multiplied loaves. Their hearts were hard and they did not believe."


THESE PEOPLE WERE RIGHT THERE WHEN JESUS FED THE PEOPLE!!! How did they not believe. They believed that He walked on water when He came to save them, but didn't believe He really fed the people?!?

I'm just a little bit confused.



But maybe we're the same. We see God do amazing things for people all the time, and maybe even in our own life, but for some reason, we don't always believe He can. We doubt His ability to come through (worry). We doubt who we are (insecurity). We doubt His plans for us (control). It should be pretty obvious He's gonna come through...just read that book He sent us.

Believe.

Songs of Inspiration

The Motions-Matthew West

This might hurt 
It’s not safe 
But I know that I’ve gotta make a change 
I don’t care If I break 

At least I’ll be feeling something 
‘Cause just ok 
Is not enough 
Help me fight through the nothingness of life 

Chorus
I don’t wanna go through the motions 
I don’t wanna go one more day 
Without Your all consuming passion inside of me 
I don’t wanna spend my whole life asking 
What if I had given everything? 
Instead of going through the motions 

No regrets 
Not this time 
I’m gonna let my heart defeat my mind 
Let Your love 
Make me whole 
I think I’m finally feeling something 

Take me all the way 

Official

Yep, that's right. You read it correctly! I'm finally on the LifeChurch.tv website!! I'm finally official!

Oh to be a child!

Judas Asparagus

A child was asked to write a book report on the entire Bible.

This is amazing and brought tears of laughter to my eyes.

I wonder how often we take for granted that childrenunderstand

what we are teaching???

Through the eyes of a child:

The Children's Bible in a Nutshell

In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was
nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says,
'The Lord thy God is one, but I think He must be a lot older than that.

Anyway, God said, 'Give me a light!' and someone did.
Then God made the world.

He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked,
but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been
invented yet.

Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad
apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden.
Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn't have cars.

Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long
as he was Abel.

Pretty soon all of the early people died
off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.

One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy,
but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a
large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked
some other people to join him, but they said they would
have to take a rain check.

After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more
famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his
birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son
named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat.

Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was
Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt
and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on
Pharaoh's people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice,
bowels, and no cable.

God fed the Israel Lights every day
with manicotti. Then he gave them His Top Ten Commandments.
These include: don't lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your
neighbor's stuff.

Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more:
Humor thy father and thy mother.

One of Moses' best helpers was Joshua who was the first
Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and
the fence fell over on the town.

After Joshua came David. He got to be king by killing a
giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had
about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise,
but that doesn't sound very wise to me.

After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets.
One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then
barfed up on the shore. There were also some minor league
prophets, but I guess we don't have to worry about them.

After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the
star of The New. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn.

(I wish I had been born in a barn too, because my mom is always saying
to me, 'Close the door! Were you born in a barn?' It would
be nice to say, 'As a matter of fact, I was.')

During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like
the Pharisees and the Democrats.

Jesus also had twelve opossums.
The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they
named a terrible vegetable after him.

Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even
preached to some Germans on the Mount.

But the Democrats and all those guys put Jesus on trial before
Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn't stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead.

Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again.
He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the
Aluminum. His return is foretold in the book of Revolution.

I couldn't have said it better myself!

"My God! My God! Why have you forsaken me? Why do you remain so distant? Why do you ignore my cries for help? Every day I call to you, my God, but you do not answer. Every night you hear my voice, but I find no relief.

YET YOU ARE HOLY. The praises of Israel surround your throne. Our ancestors trusted in you, and you rescued them. You heard their cries for help and saved them. They put their trust in you and were never disappointed.

But I am a worm and not a man. I am scorned and despised by all! Everyone who sees me mocks me. They sneer and shake their heads, saying, "Is this the one who relies on the Lord? Then let the LORD save him! If the Lord loves him so much, let the Lord rescue him!"

YET YOU BROUGHT ME SAFELY from my mother's womb and led me to trust you when I was a nursing infant. I was thrust upon you at my birth. YOU HAVE BEEN MY GOD FROM THE MOMENT I WAS BORN.

Do not stay so far from me, for trouble is near, and no one else can help me. My enemies surround me like a herd of bulls. ...


Then I will declare the wonders of your name to my brothers and sisters. I will praise you among all your people. Praise the Lord all you who fear Him! Honor Him, all you descendants of Jacob. Show Him reverence all you descendants of Israel. For He has NOT ignored the suffering of the needy. He has not turned and walked away. He has listened to their cries for help.

I will praise you among ALL the people; I will fulfill my vows in the presence of those who worship you....They will hear about everything He has done."

This is Psalm 22, or most of it rather. David speaks so well, so I thought I'd share it. God has never failed me before, thus I will continue to praise His name for all eternity.

Thoughts??

Full of Laughter!

Go here if you need a smile!

http://svt.se/hogafflahage/hogafflaHage_site/Kor/hestekor.swf

And yet another song!

"Even though the journey's long, and I know the road is hard,
The one's who's gone before me, will help me carry on.
After all that I've been through, now I realize the truth,
And I must go through the valley to stand upon the mountain of God."

Chorus to Mountain of God by Third Day

Words that Mean so Much!

By Your Side-Tenth Avenue North

Why are you striving these days
Why are you trying to earn grace
Why are you crying
Let me lift up your face
Just don't turn away

Why are you looking for love
Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough
To where will you go child
Tell me where will you run
To where will you run

And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Look at these hands and my side
They swallowed the grave on that night
When I drank the world's sin
So I could carry you in
And give you life
I want to give you life


Cause I, I love you
I want you to know
That I, I love you
I'll never let you go

Ever Wonder Why??

This is the first year I've ever made a "New Year's Resolution"--not that I'm opposed, I've just never found one for me. Well I decided I'd read the Bible from beginning to end. I was reading Genesis and it made me wonder why God chose the Israelites for His "people". They really were a bunch of screw-ups who never trusted God to do what He promised and ALWAYS took things into their own hands. 

But then again, I guess we're not that different. As His "people" now, we mess up and ALWAYS take things into our own hands. I can think of story after story just in the past week where I have done things on my own rather than waiting for God to do what He promised. 

So as a part of my New Year's Resolution, I've decided to learn from the Israelites and I'm going to start trusting that God will do as He has promised in my life. Join me!! 

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." --Jeremiah 29:11

New Times

Here's a post to "catch up" on life. :)

1) Started a new job in December and I LOVE IT!! Title: Media Distribution Specialist. Yes I am a specialist. Description: I make ANY DVD that LifeChurch.tv uses, more or less. I adore the people I work with and this is where I want to work for the rest of my life.

2) Started a new semester of school this week, and I enjoy all my classes, except for maybe one. Personal Finance (the one I'm not sure if I like). Not big on finances and investments, and such. Speech--always one of my favorite classes. Philosophy--I'm a little tempted to become a philosopher instead of "communications" but I refuse to change majors. Communication Theory--oddly enough, it's pretty fascinating (I'll keep you posted as to what this class actually involves). Organizational Communications--I really like my teacher, but still not clear on what I'm majoring in. :)

3) Decided to read the Bible from beginning to end this year. I've read it all the way through, but never from Genesis to Revelation. I'm really enjoying that!


What's new in your life??

Quote for thought

There's a difference between being successful and being significant. The significant ones are never forgotten!


Will you be successful or significant?

The Law of Sacrifice

(From the Leadership Bible--I think it's one of the 21 Laws of Leadership by John Maxwell)

Some of the saddest words in Scripture occur in Genesis 6:6. "And the Lord was sorry that He had made man on the earth and was grieved in His heart." It saddened God that every human being except for Noah's immediate family would have to be destroyed. He loved the men and women whom He had created to be like Him, those who were to rule the earth and reflect His glory. 
God determined to start again, even without a guarantee that the survivors and their descendants would do a better job of following Him. God made a covenant with Noah, giving up His right to ever again flood the earth to cleanse it of sinful humanity. Noah gave up everything He had accumulated in his long life in order to start over: SACRIFICE ALWAYS PRECEDES SUCCESS. 

They had to give up to go up.

God Always Has A Plan. Always.

It's amazing how hard that is to forget. God always has a plan. Always. Even when we mess it up and make things difficult, He still has a plan. Why do we act like He doesn't know what's going on and He's not really in charge? He's already mapped out our ENTIRE lives, why don't we just trust that? 

"God has already seen every adverse circumstance we will soon encounter--no matter how great or small--and He has THE way planned for escaping it. And, even more thrilling, often the thing that looks like an abortion of God's plan actually ends up being the road to its fulfillment if we stay in obedience and free from offense...The dream or vision will probably happen differently from how you think, but His word and His promises WILL NOT FAIL. We only risk aborting them by our disobedience."--The Bait of Satan

1 Corinthians 10:13 

The things I learn from movies...

"Never say goodbye, 

Because saying goodbye means going away,

And going away means forgetting."

--Peter Pan

Beth Moore--how does she know?!?!

I just finished my second Beth Moore study (first-Daniel, second-A Woman's Heart, God's Dwelling Place). If you have never done a Beth Moore study I would recommend you do one!! I also started an official job at LifeChurch last week. I must say I love it!! But one my first day, the day I tested, and my first interview, I was scared out of my mind. Let me just take a paragraph from Beth Moore, then you'll understand....

"Have you found yourself on the brink of the place for which God has long been preparing you? A location? A place of service? A circumstance? A position? Something for which you sense He has been preparing you for a long time?"

(obviously, being offered this job was the start of my hopeful career...I've been in prep for YEARS!!)

"Now that you see God fulfilling His promise you use you and have through excruciating preparation toward that end, are you filled with fear? An overwhelming feelilng of unreadiness? A sudden emotion that this may not be what you wanted? A little sorry you volunteered to go wherever and do whatever?"

Yep, that's what was going on inside of me. Now, I'm not emotional (or a feeler) but every time I thought about this, my heart cried out in fear. Tears would come to my eyes as I thought about everything I had done and all the expectations people ALREADY had for me. I was terrified I would fail. And fail miserably at that.

BUT I haven't. There are days when I am extremely unqualified to copy DVDs, but (here's the last portion of the paragraph)

"God will deal with those feelings and will bring them to a place of dismissal if you confess them to Him and invite Him to give you the courage to accept His personalized plan for you."

Now trust me when I say, only God could have put things in order for this. Everything happened at the right place and the right time. This is His plan, not my own. (Who'd a thought I wouldn't work in LifeKIDS first?)

I would encourage you to give your fears and thoughts to God as you stand in His purpose. He will deal with those issues, just make yourself available!!

Surely We Can Change

Surely We Can Change--David Crowder Band


And the problem is this
We were bought with a kiss
But the cheek still turned
Even when it wasn’t hit

And I don’t know
What to do with a love like that
And I don’t know
How to be a love like that

When all the love in the world
Is right here among us
And hatred too
And so we must choose
What our hands will do

Where there is pain
Let there be grace
Where there is suffering
Bring serenity
For those afraid
Help them be brave
Where there is misery
Bring expectancy
And surely we can change
Surely we can change
Something

And the problem it seems
Is with you and me
Not the Love who came
To repair everything

And I don’t know
What to do with a love like that
And I don’t know
How to be a love like that

When all the love in the world
Is right here among us
And hatred too
And so we must choose
What our hands will do

Where there is pain
Let us bring grace
Where there is suffering
Bring serenity
For those afraid
Let us be brave
Where there is misery
Let us bring them relief
And surely we can change
Surely we can change
Oh surely we can change
Something

Oh, the world’s about to change
The whole world’s about to change

Revealed!

1) What's my real name? Amanda

2) Where did I graduate high school? Edmond Memorial (Go Bulldogs!)

3) Was I a valedictorian? No, not even a Salutatorian, thanks to 8th grade math, physics and calculus

4) Where do I go to school now? UCO!!!

5) How long until I'm finished? 3 semesters, 1.5 years (plus some summer school)

6) What is my dream job? LifeKIDS!!

7) What reality show do I want to go on? Amazing Race!! (and I expect you all to watch it when I go on it!)

8) What is my favorite thing to do? (just wanted to see what you guys came up with--watching football was a good choice)

9) How do I "de-stress"? I bake--cookies and brownies!

10) What's something I may not know about you?? Those are some great answers!

Way to go! You guys did pretty well!

Pop Quiz!!

Just how well do you know me? Here's a few questions, let's see who knows the most!!
We'll start easy...

1) What's my real name?
2) Where did I graduate high school?
3) Was I a valedictorian?
4) Where do I go to school now?
5) How long until I'm finished?
6) What is my dream job?
7) What reality show do I want to go on?
8) What is my favorite thing to do?
9) How do I "de-stress"?
10) What's something I may not know about you??

I'll answer later this week!
I've got finals this week, and a job interview on Tuesday!!