My Banner Will Be Clear

I'm a part of the fellowship of the unashamed.
I have the Holy Spirit power.
The die has been cast.
I have stepped over the line.
The decision has been made.
I am a disciple of his.

I won't look back, let up, slow down, back away, or be still.
My past is redeemed, my present makes sense, my future is secure.
I am finished and done with low living, sight walking, small planning, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tamed vision,mundane talking, cheap living, and dwarfed goals.
I no longer need preeminence, prosperity, position,promotions, plaudits, or popularity.
I don't have to be right, first, recognized, praised, regarded, or rewarded.
I now live by faith, lean on his presense, walk by patience,lift by prayer, and labor by power.
My face is set, my gait is fast, my goal is Heaven, My road is narrow, my way rough, my companions few, My guide reliable, my mission clear.

I can not be bought, compromised, detoured, lured away, turned back, deluded or delayed.
I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice, hesitate in the presence ofthe adversary, negotiate at the table of the enemy, ponder at the pool of popularity, or meander in the maze of mediocrity.

I won't give up, shut up, let up, until I have stayed up, stored up, prayed up, paid up, and preached up for the cause of Christ.
I am a disciple of Jesus Christ.
I must go till he comes, give till I drop, preach until all know, and work till he stops me,and when he comes for his own... he will have no problem recognizing me...My banner will be clear.

Jeremiah 1:6-10

" 'Ah, Sovereign Lord," I said, "I do not know how to speak. I am only a child.'

But the Lord said to me, "Do not say, 'I am only a child.' You must go to everyone I send you to and say whatever I command you. Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you and will rescue you," declares the Lord. Then the Lord reached out his hand and touched my mouth and said to me, "Now, I have put my words in your mouth. See, today I appoint you over nations and kingdoms to uproot and tear down, to destroy and overthrow, to build and plant."

I don' t know about you, but I've had this same conversation with God. "I'm just a child." "I've barely made it out of high school and you want me to do what?!" I've always found myself in positions where I can lead, without being named the "leader," but for some reason, when I find myself in those same positions now, I find myself scared. I don't like it when other people label me as a child, even if it's just because I haven't had many life experiences, but I find that I often have that as my biggest excuse for not wanting to go where God leads me.

All I know is that God is leading me, He has gifted me, and I was created for this time. The God of the Ages is standing in front of me making way, to the sides of me to support me when I stumble, and behind me to minimize the attacks from when I'm not looking. I know that I have to combat this phrase every day. I am not just a child, I may be young, but God has gifted me.

What's your excuse?

If I die...

In our discussion of Francis Chan's book Crazy Love, we talked about living each day as it was your last. A hard concept for most people, especially people as young as me. I don't really want to think about today being my last day here on earth. There are so many things I can't wait to do! But then our conversation turned to "What would you like to be remembered by?"

"His work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each man's work. If what he has built survives, he will receive his reward. If it is burned up, he will suffer loss; he himself will be saved, but only as one escaping through the flames." 1 Corinthians 3:13-15

I certainly don't want all the things I focused my time on to be burnt by the fire. I want to focus time on things that will matter in eternity. At the age of 19, I have a decision to make. Do I want to be known for the things I have achieved in my life (which is how a lot of people talk about me right now) or do I want to be known for how I loved others, or served, or gave of my time? After much thought (believe it or not, it was a hard decision) I've decided I'd like to be known for loving Jesus with everything in me. My biggest dream is for me to walk into a room and radiate Christ so much, that without speaking, people identify that I had "been with Jesus". Now this will take a lot of work. It's a different way of thinking. I'm driven by achievements. But Christ has called me to love him and seek after His ways.

By the time I go to meet Jesus and worship at his feet, I want people to say...

"Mandy, that girl who loved Jesus."

"Mandy, that one girl who always had time to sit and listen."

"Mandy, is that the girl who gave all she was? and all she had?"

I want people to know I love Jesus by my actions, not by what I speak.

What about you? What do you want to be known for? Are you driven by achievements?

The Simplicity of "Yes, Dad."

Yesterday, I got to spend a day at the Zoo with the Edge family celebrating Brooklyn's 4th birthday! And while I had a lot of fun, I, of course came away with something to blog about :)Between old people wearing matching purple shirts, giving the play-by-play movements of the monkey and seeing the animals right next to the fence, there are plenty of topics I could go on and on about, but the thing I took away came from the girls.

1) My Daddy is here to protect me.
2) His directions are simple, if I just listen.

On their last trip to the zoo, the ostridge had gotten a little close to Brooklyn and tried to snap at her. So when we made it to see the giraffes and zebras in that terrain, she was taken by fear. The zebras were the first things she wanted to see, and she kept reminding us that's where she wanted to go. She was fired up about seeing them. Yet, once she caught sight of the ostridge, so was paralyzed. The animal she was "dying" to see was no longer important as her "fear" looked her in the face. I tried to help and so did her mom. But all it took was for her dad to say, "It's ok, Brooklyn. I won't let the ostridge hurt you." She slowly walked up to the fence and got to see the animal she loved. Just as Justin comforted Brooklyn with his protection, God offers the same to me. My Heavenly Father will always protect me from evil. I don't need to be paralyzed from fear when I am chasing after the goal He has for my life. He will stand and protect me so I can reach my dreams.

I was amazed at how easily the girls would listen to their dad. "Go kiss that fish" "Wave to the monkey." "Get close to the cage so you can see the wolves." Each time the girls listened with out hesitation (or at least little hesitation). Sometimes it made Sheena and I nervous, but they didn't care. Their daddy said it was ok, so it must be. Why have I lost that simplicity in my relationship with God? Each time He directs me, even in the simple things, I hesitate and argue and most of the time lose that opportunity to be apart of His plan. Sometimes the things Justin would tell them to do was just crazy(like howling at the wolves) but they did it anyway. The simplicity of "yes."


Well, there you have it. My knowledge from the zoo. Next, I'll have to share the funny moments. Thoughts?