Europe-2

Our bike tour...can you believe I got in FOUR wrecks while we were riding. I was not created to ride a bicycle for the rest of my life!

Tina and I on the boat to our train station in Zurich!! It was so beautiful there...I can't wait to go back some day.

The amazing landscape of the Palace of Versailles.

The Starving Baker

So if any of you have read any of the Habitudes books, you've probably heard this story before. I'm gonna try and make it short, so that you don't get bored, but I don't think I've ever had anything pinpoint me so easily. :) Okay, so this baker opens a bakery and it gets really busy fast. Overtime you notice he's loosing weight. Soon he's shrunk to pretty much nothing. Why? He's so focused on serving others, he forgets to feed himself....

I don't know about you, but sometimes (well, most of the time) I focus on making others' lives easier placing as much as I can, and more on myself. And I will go to extreme lengths to take on people's burdens. I don't feel comfortable when other people are struggling. Anyone.

So all this to say, my task for the next week is to feed myself. Spiritually I've been lacking on this a little bit. Do any of you struggle with serving others so much you forget to fill yourself up?

Children of...

I had an odd rendezvous today while I was at work. I work with my kids who are between 2 1/2 and 3--and they just haven't got that listening thing down very well. Maybe I'm not strict enough or mean enough?? I don't know, but I do know they don't listen all that well. BUT BUT BUT I have learned they respond best when you just wrap them up in your arms and whisper quietly to them individually what you would like them to do or stop doing. Isn't that strange? They don't respond to anything else quite like that. Today we were painting with dot paints and I showed each one of them how to use them correctly--and all of them used the paints the wrong way at least once. I still had to remind them how to use it and I had just told them not even a minute earlier. The last child who used them--I pulled him real close and made him watch my eyes and whispered, "Don't forget this is how you are supposed to use it, remember?" And you know what, he didn't once use them incorrectly. :)

Have you ever wondered why God prefers to speak in a quiet and soft voice? (Granted there are times when children need the booming voice to get them under control). Hmmm...

Be sure you can hear His quiet voice if that's how He's speaking to you.

Fat Tuesday

So for those of you fortunate enough to vote on Fat Tuesday here in a few weeks...do you know who to vote for? Please don't go unprepared!! If you're not sure, go take this quiz! It's kind of fun to see where your personal policies lie. Let me know what candidate you were close to. My scored me as a Huckabee voter, but I don't agree with Terrorism policies, and of course, I was farthest from Obama.

*I'm really jealous of all of you who get to vote in the Primaries. I'm really excited to vote in the election! Can't wait!

http://www.kieskompas-usa.nl/page/0/thema+s/

I want to see the results...

Monday Morning Tunes

I have to start out and say I was really excited we didn't have school today so I could sleep in and catch up from my exhausting weekend (although I wouldn't have changed it for anything). I slept until 7 a.m. Now to understand my frustration, I am not capable of sleeping past 9 anymore. As a teenager, I'd like to be able to sleep as late as the rest of my friends--they're all night owls. :) So needless to say I didn't get to sleep in and I'm still pretty tired, but I suppose I'll rest later.

Monday Morning Tunes--
"I remember all the times
The good times and the bad (some good and some are bad)
I'm still holding on to you
Some days I wanna run
And times I come undone
But I still belong to you
That’s how I know that
When I feel like caving in
My heart my soul is wearing thin
I just want to give up
Nothing seems at all to add up
Can you hear me Lord?
My face is down upon the floor
Its then you whisper in my ear
Be still and know I'm here."

If we would just remember God is here, even when we don't feel him. When everything comes crashing down, God will keep it from crumbling on you, we just have to let him take over and be still to hear him speak. God speaks in a soft voice more often than a booming one! Trust me, trusting in God's faithfulness and believe in His word is worth it even though giving up control is extremely difficult!

Faithfulness-4

4) Be faithful to your church.

This is kind of hard topic to discuss. For those of you who know my family, you know just how faithful we have been to our church. When our friends left, we remained and listened to conversation after conversation about why we should leave. We dealt (and still deal with) bitterness and grudges held by people who still attend Life. Through all this, we believe God has placed us in the situations and places He has for a reason, and until He says it's time to go, we won't budge. (I know, we're an odd family). This is hard for all of us, but we've learned to persevere and even though we don't always agree with decisions made, we have remained faithful to God's plan for our church! We're sold out to a greater vision than our own, and it's difficult for us to find excuses for leaving when so many people are surrendering their lives to Christ!! If you are ever tempted to leave, make sure you aren't making a decision from hurt and that it is truly God calling you elsewhere.

Faithfulness-3

3) Be faithful to yourself.

For this one I just want to copy what my dad said, because I don't think I could say it any better than he did so concisely. Here it is...
"Be the person God created you to be. Work hard and study, be tenacious. Don't forget to rest and play some, too. Don't' forget to laugh. (and finally) Don't let any distractions get in the way."
Here's my version:
Work first, play later. Rest and play (I certainly don't do that enough). LAUGH!!!! It's great exercise too! We all need a little laughter in our day. (After all it takes less work to smile than frown--a little tidbit for you all!). NO DISTRACTIONS....focus, focus, focus (to quote a neighbor).

I wanted to encourage you all to not get so caught up in pleasing others, that you let your heart fade! Live always in His joy and embrace His strength in your weaknesses, after all we can't do it on our own--hate to break it to ya, but we just weren't made to be alone.

(I don't have any reflective questions, but I'd love to hear what you think.)

Faithfulness-2

2) Be faithful to your family and friends.

On this one, I think I have a pretty good grasp on how to be faithful to both family and friends. I don't know about you, but this has been a little bit of a struggle since I have been able to choose my friends. I understand you have to be faithful to your family, but to do it without bailing on your friends can be difficult sometimes. I've learned that the friends who understand this battle are the best, because they'll still be your friend even if you have to stop being their friend for a while. Thankfully, I haven't had to fully end friendships with anyone. This is a gift God has blessed me with. When I form a relationship with someone (be that friend or family), I find it almost impossible to end the relationship entirely. I've never been able to give up on someone, even if they've hurt me or others around me. Thankfully, this part of faithfulness is almost natural.

How do you show your faithfulness to someone? Is it easy or hard for you to be faithful to a relationship?

Faithfulness-1

One thing my dad encouraged me to never forget as I grow older is my faithfulness.
1) Be faithful to God and His vision for your life.
2) Be faithful to your family and friends.
3) Be faithful to yourself.
and lastly
4) Be faithful to your church.

Tonight I'm going to hit on the first one, and the rest of them I'll hit later this week. I'll try and keep it short, because I'm learning how little people like reading long posts. Being faithful to God and His vision for my life. Being faithful to God is pretty self-explanatory, so I'm not going to go into that so much. However, being faithful to His plan is much harder. God's plan for my life is simply to work in the church and be a wife/mom. Wouldn't think it would be so hard to follow, right? But I've faced more opposition in this area than any of the other four areas. For starters, the closer I get to having my "dream job" the more other people oppose me. I also feel less and less capable of being able to do it--which is most likely a step in the right direction). It by no means we'll make me "rich" in my families' terms. Thankfully, my parents are supportive of this career--they see my passion. But even though not all of my family understands my mentality and I feel less qualified today than I did when I was 11, I can't deny the passion I have to work in His ministry--and not just a general term. I have to continue to be faithful in the small areas now, so that I can be entrusted with greater things in the future.

**What are the things in God's plan you need to continue being faithful towards, even if the enemy is opposing you? Are there things in the past you were faithful in and God blessed you for that?

Old Bridges

On Monday, I start my last semester of high school. Can you believe it? I've waited for this day for so long, it's weird to think my graduation is almost here. For graduation presents, my friends and I are making a movie of funny moments and unforgettable memories we've shared the past four years. As I go through the pictures, I thought about how blessed I am to have such incredible friends. (If you're new, go look at the earlier posts on my friends). God blessed me with such a tight group and I must admit, I'm now dreading getting my diploma in May. Don't get me wrong--I'm so ready to move on to my next chapter of schooling, but I don't want to leave my friends behind. Two of my friends are moving away for college. Four of us are staying in Edmond, but only two of us are actually attending college here. Our lives will be so different, I'm scared to see how it changes us. I don't want to become like the groups of best friends who do everything together in high school and then not talk to each other after graduating. My mom encouraged me in that we're not a typical group of friends, and we've managed to stay close for a while, so not a whole lot will change; another friend told me to just think of it optimistically. We'll all be meeting new people and making new friends....but I don't want new friends. :)

Any suggestions on how to deal with this fear?? I know our lives can't be ruled by fear, but I'm stuck and don't know how to defeat it.

Brokenness

So this morning, I was reading a friend's blog and she was talking about being truly sorry. And as I was reading it, I realized how hard my heart has become in this area. Have you ever done something intentionally and not feel bad for doing it--even when you know it hurt someone else or it broke God's heart? I pray your heart is not that hardened, but I know I do it a lot. I think the hardest thing for me is that I have that personality that I need justification behind rules or I don't see any reason in following them. So even if I'm breaking a rule (be it my parents' rules, school rules, etc.) I don't always feel as I'm sinning--but I am because God instructs us to follow authority. I need your help in praying for my heart to be broken to others' reasoning for rules and not simply living by my own set of rules, along with recognizing how my actions and words hurt others. And as always please hold me accountable to this, because this is probably the hardest spiritual roadblock I've ever faced!! Simply because it takes a complete change of heart and mindset (and you all know how little I change).

Patience

How many phrase can you think of that have the word "patience" in them?
Patience is a virtue.
Great things come to those who are patient.
Love is patient.

And I'm sure there are so many more. Have you ever thought about how different our lives would be if we were just willing to wait? Willing to wait on the slow employee at the store. Willing to wait on the computer to load. Willing to wait on people who don't run on the same "clock" as you. Today, I needed to be willing to wait on my car. It has a safety feature that's supposed to prevent other people from stealing my car, but sometimes, it confuses my key with a key that doesn't fit. This has happened three times and all three were at the most inconvenient time. Twice it has made me late for school (and if you know me, I HATE, and I mean HATE being late!) and other time I was late for a birthday party. You're supposed to just sit and let it reset, but I'm not very patient so I kept trying my key and sat in the cold for 35 minutes waiting for my car to reset. If I had just waited a little bit longer to try my key, my car would have reset....
How many times do we like to "jump the gun" in God's plan and do things on our own? Why is it so hard for us to just sit and wait for our heart to "reset" and follow God's plan? How different would our lives be if we were just willing to sit and wait? I' m going to try it this week, I challenge you to do the same.

Silence

Last night in Konnect, we talked about silence. Have you ever thought about how hard it is to be in complete silence? We were watching a Nooma video ("Noise") and during the video there was 10 minutes of silence and the kids couldn't sit quietly. It was strange to watch. They were squirmy and giggly. They just couldn't be quiet. This reminded me of my Day Alone With God in Zurich this summer. We could only talk during meals, and from about 9 am clear through dinner we listened for God's quiet voice.

I sat against pier that reached out over Lake Zurich and I listened to the water hit the rocks for the majority of the day...and all I could think about was how creative God was when He created the sounds of this world and as He creates us. Everything is so different, yet all beautiful. As I sat in silence, all I could do was be thankful for this beauty that God has place on this earth. I had a crystal clear lake at my feet, snow capped mountains across the lake and beautiful swans at my feet. I've never felt so at peace...

When was the last time you sat in God's beauty and simply listened to His quiet voice?? Or have you ever just sat in silence? If you haven't I highly suggest you do! You'll certainly be amazed at how hard it is to not have background noise, even if it's just thoughts in your head.

Do You Even Know Me?!?

So since everyone is doing this "Things you may not know about me" type things, I thought I'd do the same thing. I love reading random facts about people!

1. I danced from age 3 until I made it to high school. 12 years!!!

2. I jumped from Pre-K to 1st grade when I was 4.

3. I took 6 hrs at UCO last semester and made A's in both classes.

4. I fell through a ceiling at church.

5. My dream job is to work in LifeKIDS.

6. I was born with a full head of hair!

7. My first 2 phrases were "I don't want to." and "I do it myself." (sound familiar? I still use these phrases!)

8. I plan to run the Amazing Race with my friend Hannah.

9. I love puzzles!

10. In my first year of driving I got into 3 fender benders and one wreck that totalled my car...but only one was my fault (it was the only one that left no marks!!)

What are some things I may not know about you?


---I'm going to take a break from my book. I've got some other things to blog about and i don't want to spoil the book for you all! I recommend you read it.